Written on a bus on the way home, 3rd November.
1. It’s 8pm. I’ve been out since 3pm and so far I’ve sung my lungs out and stuffed my face with more Korean Barbecue than I ever thought I would ever consume in my lifetime.
2. You weren’t supposed to see me today, I think parting would’ve hurt less if you didn’t call me. But you wanted to be here on my birthday, even if it were only for a moment.
3. I wish we were more infinite. If only we didn’t need to say goodbye. Sometimes I wish “Goodbye” was less infinite.
4. This is temporary. The parting, the missing, the hurting, all of it is temporary. We are not.
5. I miss you. I think I’ve been trying to deny it, like missing someone was somehow the trait of an unhealthy relationship.
6. If we were more infinite, maybe we’d stop time in its place, maybe time will open its cold, cobwebbed heart to us. And maybe time is nothing but a construct.
7. If we lived together, I think the world will stop functioning. Not because of our love but because of the fact that we stopped carrying it’s weight on our backs.
8. If we lived together can you promise to do the chores when I forget? Because I will forget and you are going to hate it.
9. I think I love you very much. Maybe I love you too much to care about the rest of the world. Even when it starts burning down.
10. You weren’t supposed to be here on my birthday, but here you were. Maybe that’s enough. Maybe that’s what matters. Maybe then, we can be infinite. And forever doesn’t need to exist. And Infinity doesn’t need to exist. You weren’t supposed to be here. But you came.
11. We are infinite. Nothing will ever change that.